MOVING ON

The would be journalist has moved on.... Where to?  No one can tell me or maybe no one has found my ear to tell me.  I await with interest.  What could have made her leave?

Her links to the Iranian government?

Her character assassination of friends in her self-published book?

All I know is that he went and went permanently.  She got rid of her stuff.  She sold her flat and is GONE. There are many here happy with the result.

Personally I don't care either way except I will miss reports on her.

TRY AS THEY MIGHT

The new eatery/drinkery that's opened in Tom Tom in Beyoglu could be good or not.  They recently sent out invitations.  Canapes and a glass of wine to be enjoyed in the heated garden.  This was October and it was chilly but it also involved a lot of smokers.  As you know Istanbul is now the place where few venues allow or dare to let you smoke indoors.  Thus any garden space with the promise of heating gets all the nicotine addicts out of the woodwork.  Plus everyone is now looking for outside venues in the Beyoglu area given that all the tables have been taken from the sidewalk by local government decree.  Paymane (the name of the restaurant) hosted some very nice canapes.  Their one glass of wine (included in the cover charge) was not so great but got drunk nonetheless.  However, it was noted that if you wished for a second glass you would have to pay the steepest price for wine (in this calibre of restaurant).  No other bar/restaurant in Cihangir was as expensive and certainly no where in Tom Tom.  We all know Cihangir's prices are steep, given that it has a village for local's atmosphere.  Tom Tom is an area that is not.  It has no other bars/restaurants to recommend you to come there.  It has no other attractions.  It doesn't even have decent parking.  So why would you go there?  No view, no atmosphere, no magic.  Thus it is only Paymane that could attract you to the area and since their food, although nice is nothing too hugely exciting and the costs of their drinks are certainly no incentive to go.  I could pay a lesser price for a glass of wine on a rooftop bar with stunning views.  However, saying all that Paymane is a nice place but easily forgettable if you don't have an incentive to go back for.  It's a pity since the Cihangir outdoor crowd are looking for another venue to meet and so far it's too pricey for them to go to, given it's a longer walk in a dark and uninteresting area.  So Paymane drop your prices, do some seriously marketing to get back all those people who came a few weeks ago and who liked your place but ....well...not enough.

SHAME ON HIM!

This is a bit old news but new to some.  An outstanding pillar of the expat community, one loved by many and one who has contributed tirelessly to charity in money and time (a great deal of time) had the carpet pulled from under her.  Deserving or not?  Who am I to judge?  Ok I will.  I think she deserved better from all around her.  I think she continues to deserve better from all around her.  I think she should be given more leeway than anyone else I know finding themselves in the position she's in.  So what exactly happened?

She had an affair.  Haven't so many of us done that?  Thought of it?  Secretly wanted it?  She had the balls to actually have an affair that lead to her falling in love.  I mean who wouldn't after so many years of marriage?  However, she and her lover choose to take things further and actually set up home together.  Her children were older, her husband appeared fairly disinterested and the charity work could only fulfill a part of who she is.  Thus her lover and her agreed to take this walk into the unknown.  She told her husband.  He screamed, he shouted he was not amused since he is a man used to getting his way.  He is a man used to having things exactly how he wants them and suddenly there he had a wife who wasn't keen to continue to live that way.  Suddenly the lover was no where to be seen.  He had disappeared.  He turned off his phone, he refused all calls from her.  He went to ground.  She was left standing.  Taking the flax and watching everything around her burn.  Her lover had changed his mind.  Why?  Oh put it down to cowardice.  This lonely lady began the spiral into despair and loss.  Her husband kicked her out (she slept on a friends floor).  Her husband removed all credit cards (this is a woman who has worked all her life to support her husband's world and therefore had no career other than mother, wife, carer, charity worker and friend).  Most painful of all, her children rejected her.  They had forgotten the amazing mother and woman she is.  They had forgotten how human and normal she is.  Her husband went on to divorce her and shame her anywhere he could.  Since he is a rather well known personality there are a lot of well known people who now regard her as non persona gratis.  Thankfully many friends remained supporting her.  Her kids still don't talk to her and she is building her life as best she can.  As far as I can see the only mistake she made was trusting her lover.  He seems to have got scot free.  No recriminations, no bad press, no one disowning him.  What a weasel he is.  Anyone know who he is?  Send me his details and let's shame him here.

STALKING ON THE INTERNET

Ah come on, you've all done this!  Whether it's a tiny winny look to see if your ex has gone bald or the girl you hated at school has grown fat.  We are all guilty of utilising the internet to find out about people we don't really want to get in contact with again.  However, beware!  As you are doing the stalking, so is someone stalking you.  Sure you can do a lot to lock down i.e. not show info on FB or don't get involved with twitter or Linkden or even have a photograph taken at some event that can tag you.  Do you really want to be that annoyomous especially as you may well be using the internet to promote yourself for work.

Where is this leading to?  Ah to this.  I have heard of three cases now of internet stalking that has lead to divulgence of information the owners of which would rather it did not get out.  Let's begin with the least interesting:

1. Some delusional lady thought to stalk her boyfriend's wife.  Yes, I know it should be the other way round.  Her obsessive jealousy lead her to believe her boyfriend was cheating on her with his wife!  She became a facebook friend of the wife (very daring given the wife might have triggered something but then I heard she had disguised herself as a man).  Over the course of the year she stalked and then discovered the wife was pregnant!  I guess that's proof of a cheating boyfriend!

2. A-way back ex of someone began an internet search to discover his ex girlfriend was now married and running a small pension in rural France.  For some strange and explicable reason the stalker booked the entire pension for  two weeks in July.  Even sent over a small deposit as required and naturally never showed, but wrote an email stating they were running late and would be there 3 days later and would pay for the days they couldn't make, thus buggering up rental options for at least a week.  I feel particularly bad for this one since who knows what this had cost the owners.

3. A renter left his apartment without completing the contract.  The owner of property did not lie low on this but went to work discovering his ex renter had a Facebook profile.  He went to work on setting up a fake facebook profile and friended the ex renter.  He then, over sometime, managed to extract the ex renters new address.  Not easy, I grant you and I would like to give you the full story but won't, on account I might have to use that in the future as I think it's just the best story line ever.  Once the address was in hand the ex renter got a warning letter from the lawyer for non payment of rent.  My advice to him would be to pay up or face a court case that would cost him a lot more since the livid owner of the apartment has had enough of delinquent renters and has vowed to track defaulters down and sue them to the limits of the law.

So up to you guys how guilty you are of pissing someone off as to whether you lock down or continue to brazenly go on believing no one out there has an axe to grind with you.

LIFE AND LOVES

People travel for all sorts of reason and a lot travel for love.  Someone said that men come for love but women stay for it.  It could be true.  Another foreign man has given in to his Turkish love.  I don't know why this way round it should be so shocking since so many foreign women give up great jobs, lives, family to be with some Turkish man who works in a coffee shop or carpet shop and doesn't have any real chances of a future.  The most recent acquisition to Istanbul is an American who does know what he's letting himself in for having lived for many years in Cairo but it's a little scary and daunting having to find work and a etch out a life for himself here.  Years ago, not many men left their worlds for their woman.  I recently met a Dutch man who told me he had lived in Cihangir 25 years ago and had to contend himself with the company of his wife's friend's Turkish boyfriends.  He said it would have been OK if there hadn't be so many dramas and if he had understood more than a sprinkling of the language.  He said he longed for someone of his culture, someone who could understand him and not keep misunderstanding his friendliness to his wife's girlfriends.  Today, Cihangir is a different world, indeed Turkey is.  This Dutchman would be more comfortable now and in the evenings would find a great many foreign friends, male and female, single and attached out in the bars around the place.

I heard of a Happy Marriage.  Yes I know this is already totally newsworthy.  The GM of a 5 star hotel 16 years ago hit on his boss while a trainee and told her to 'give up everything and come away with me.  One day I'll be GM and your love can help me achieve this.'  The lady, so in love, took a leap of faith and now they are exactly where he said they would be and more importantly still only have eyes for each other.  Sigh!

I overheard a lady the other night say 'I'm trying every drink to get me drunk tonight.'  Sadly that isn't so much a drink on the rocks but a  marriage.  They've been a happy couple for a long time but like so many unions, naturally one grows apart.  I hope the couple in question understand that their marriage has been successful because they have been great friends and great partners but it might be better to go their own ways so they can remain great friends and who knows, in the future one can always find each other interesting in ways again.

Did anyone think the latest on/off American/Turk combo was going to last?  Right now it's off again but no one is expecting that to be the last of it.  Do you think it's the age difference that is making this relationship so difficult?  How about family pressure?  Maybe financial differences?  Hell, no it's just called incompatibility.  They bring out the worst in each other.  Both fighting for supremacy.  Both great people without each other but lost and aimless with.  The Girl was seen on Friday night swinging her legs at Khavedan chatting to three male friends.  The Man in the story was seen entering 21 with two girls in tow (very obviously brought in for jealousy stirring).  The Girl of the story was last seen in exactly the same place with the same bunch of friends and the Man in the Story was sitting near by watching her alone.

CONGRATULATIONS TO THE LOVED UP COUPLE

Only last week Cihangir's famous couple made it official.  Or at least officially that they were planning on making it official.  Yes, an engagement.  The venue was held in the groom-to-be's family mansion miles out of most Cihangir residents comfort zone and was stupendous.  Marble floors that led you out to the large garden dotted with waiters holding trays of champagne filled glasses.  Others walked around the 80 of so guests with tiny, dainty nibbles.  The bride-to-be, glamours in her dark floor length gown.  Laughed in her native Australian way, as she moved around her guests looking very much like a young Natalie Wood but with tits (her own, but then of course they would be since she is not a product of Turkish society).  Her two best friends (from down the road back home) were equally glamourous wearing heels so high they wouldn't have to take off to join the mile high club.  They laughed and joked in the Australian way of back slapping friendliness while matching any man drink for drink.  They certainly outshone some of the other ladies without even trying.

I spotted a couple of other women there wearing dresses so short I'm sure they were originally tops!  Not sure what statement they were trying to elicit but sadly back home, in someone's native Australia we might wonder how much they charge.  Then there was the lady who arrived badly underdressed.  For a while there I wondered if she was brought in to readjust the disco ball but then sported her hiding herself under a tree, champagne in hand wearing her jeans and t-shirt.  Someone had obviously forgotten to explain it was a formal party  I felt for her but more so for the other lady who thought frills and sequins was a cool fashion statement.  I'm not sure how others faired but there were a few moments when my heels sunk into the grass and suddenly I was shorter than everyone around me.

It was a lovely night.  Wonderful weather.  Great wine.  Amazing hospitality.  Fun people and a very happy couple.  Frankly, if that night was a taster for the wedding than I have to say that I can't wait for the big day.  Don't you dare not invite me.  I already have my frock picked!

CAT FIGHT OVER CATS

Cihangir seems to be a little cat crazy and because of this a cat fight has broken out.  Posted on the Cihangir Today e-newspaper started by a well-informed and excellent editor, is a cat fight.  Amongst the important stuff like 'what is the prime minister doing' and 'latest on Lybia' is a forum dedicated to Cihangir's cats.  With these lovely furry friends that we all have a soft spot for are also the other cats - women.  Today on the forum a cat fight broke out.  One lady attacked another for not being the caring woman/mother of cats that she professes to be.  The expat in question (and the one being attacked) is undoubtably one of Cihangir's most ardent cat carers.  She is known to have gone out of her way and pocket to safeguard the safety and health of these helpless creatures.  Everyone knows that if there is a cat in trouble you can count on this lady to find a way to help.  Thus it is surprising to have a Cihangir resident sharpen her claws and take a swipe at the said expat cat lover.  The expat cat lover sharpened her claws and took a swipe back.  Another cat lover, backed the expat cat lover and hissed a bit and also took a swipe.  Frankly I can see this sport catching on.  I certainly will be glued to the pages of this forum to see what their next move is,  although it might take place in a real arena as the Cihangir - Cool for Cat's society is holding a meeting tomorrow at 11am in White Mill.  Everyone will get a chance to give help, make suggestions, offer promises and take sides.  Looks like some fur will fly.  I don't think I want to miss that one.
PS  My money's on the expat cat lover.